Goat Knockers

recreationalcannibalism:

the-adequate-gatsby:

stultifyandstupefy:

derpes:

And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”

And Abraham replied, “What.”

God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.

And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”

To which they responded, “Gay.” 

And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.

(via porcupinespine)

ruraljackdaw:

psilentasincjelli:

ruraljackdaw:

voyagesofabookworm:

thatwhoviansynesthete:

wearejohnlocked:

hungarian:

do british people have a special £ key on their keyboards

how do you hashtag ??????

hashtag is over by the enter key don’t you worry your lil butt

wait

what… what do American keyboards look like then?

oh

(via apuremorning)

porndirector:

i’d be so attractive if i was attractive

(via cuzyourethebest)